Friday, 17 February 2012

Broken Barnet: Regal Visit to Barnet Next Month - and it's not Brian Coleman

''Spending cut on road maintenance provides opportunity
for obsequious behaviour by Barnet Councillor"
Link to Mrs Angry's 'Broken Barnet'

"A Royal Visit, some lucky winners, and some sad losers: Mrs Angry Predicts..."

"She sees a tubby little Tory councillor preening himself in front of a mirror, wrestling with his waiscoat buttons, smooothing down his best tie with trembling hands. Look, he is practising a bow. Not too low, Brian, those trousers are a little teeny bit tight, and her Majesty doesn't want to catch sight of your bootylicious backside, now does she? 

Brian looks carefully at his reflection. 'Ma'am', he mutters, with a manly nod, the knowing, expectant nod of a man who, in this time of unprecedented austerity, has just paid £1,000 of local tax payers money for a four-minute anthem in praise of the royal jubilee. Her Majesty looks on in bemusement. Councillor Coleman sits and waits by his post-box, for a special letter from Buckingham Palace. The letter never comes.

"Yes: Mrs Angry predicts a royal visit to our borough, next month."

1 comment:

  1. By some mysterious act every road on which the royal carriage is to glide will be resurfaced in the next month and that will be the year's budget allocated.